There are people in life who pride themselves on being able to hold up a mirror to others, in order to educate the other person about their faults. The person holding the mirror, is of course, perfect. They have no faults. They invent a history about their past that qualifies them to judge, a history that nobody else can question. And the person stares back at the grotesque reflection in the mirror that has been presented to them – and they are left wondering…how am I so disgusting? How am I so terrible? When did this happen to me? When did I get so bad?
Sadly, a lot of these good people lose their confidence. The distorted image that they are shown, instead of spurring them on to aspire to be perfect, destroys them. They believe that they are as bad as has been described – slowly, but surely, becoming a shell of who they once were.
Sometimes though, you have to question – what if the mirror is wrong? What if the person holding that mirror up to you – what if they are a clown? What if they are presenting you with a mirror from the infamous ‘Hall of Mirrors’, where the concave and convex surfaces make your face look too long and your body look too short…what if we went around believing that those reflections that we saw were a true likeness of ourselves?
The interesting thing about life though – every dog has its day. I repeat! Every dog has its day! You simply need to bide your time. And I believe in this strongly. They say, don’t they, ‘those who live in glass houses, should not throw stones’? The problem with being someone who holds mirrors up to others, to point out their flaws…how long before someone snatches that mirror out of your hand and holds it up in front of you? Then you will notice that your own reflection is as repulsive as everyone else’s – what do you do then?
You either learn from your mistake, repent and grow. Or you carry on in your own merry way, for the same mistakes to be repeated again and again and again.
There are some good people who hold up mirrors though. The hairdressers and the make-up artists, who work on you, trying to bring out the best in you – and voila! When they have finished working you, not only do you look a million times better, you feel amazing too.
If you use that analogy to think about the people who praise you and nurture you, who make you improve by developing your confidence, to bring out the best in you…think about how much more effective that is than someone who constantly finds fault with you and tells you that you just aren’t good enough.
Karma. The lovely thing about karma is that eventually, those nit-pickers, flaw-finders, people with a superiority complex – when the mirror is turned on them, and the horror that they face when they discover that they are not as good as they thought they were…well, its deserved to say the least.
The bottom line is simple – if you want to get the best out of people – you have to see the best in people – and you have to tell them what it is, that they are really, really good at. And if you can’t do that – then take a good long look at yourself in the mirror – and fix what is wrong with you, before you try to fix the faults of others!